Sunday, October 31, 2010
Just a quick notice
Hey people. So this week, instead of writing my blog here, I will post something on facebook and then send emails to people who don't have a facebook. If you'd like to read it and I don't have your email address, just email me and I'll send you the post. I'll explain why I'm doing it this way in the full update. Thanks!
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Let's Talk Politics.
I am from Berkeley, California. The people who know it either know it for the university or for it's political reputation. Berkeley, and the whole San Francisco bay area are known for our discontent with the way things in America are run. The home of the hippie movement and the black panthers, the place where "Columbus Day" is known as "Indigenous Peoples Day." We are "always" protesting wars and raising our voices. We are nothing compared to La France. A few months ago, I thought being Obama would be the hardest job in the world because no one can agree and no one is satisfied with anything he does. The left thinks he's not doing enough and the right thinks he's doing too much. Well, after almost two months in this country, I think I have to say that being the president of France would be harder. In the US, people may be unhappy, but they don't act upon their unhappiness all that much. In France, they act.
Things are getting scary here. I know I have mentioned in almost all my blogs a strike or a protest that has resulted in fewer classes. There protest marches are continuing and becoming more frequent. In the cities they can be even riot-like, with people who break shop windows and jump on cars. They are now adding different forms of protest into the mix as well. There is a gas shortage because people "blocked" the oil refinery which means they put up a ton of barriers so that no one can get in and work. They are also doing this at schools, my school being a participent. What this means is every morning before it is light out the more political students search for anything to keep the gate closed, be that planks of wood or trash cans or chairs or tables. Then the other students arrive and, much to their disappointment, can't get to class. So I haven't had school since last thursday (the...14th I believe).
A couple days ago the national news channel featured my school as an example of this type of protest, called a "blocus". There was also another example of a school in a bigger city and things were getting a bit rowdier over there. What left the biggest impression on me was footage of a high school kid being shot by a police man with a paralyzer. It was ment to just stun him, which to me is bad enough because in the footage this kid didn't appear to be way out of line, but it hit him in the eye and disfigured his face. I turned, shocked, to my host mother and asked if it was legal for police to do that sort of thing. She responded that the police can get very violent in France. I believe her. I always wonder in these situations what the police man is thinking. Why doesn't he sympathize with the cause? The reform affects him too. How did he feel when he pulled the trigger with the goal of stunning a young kid that could be his child?
I said in one blog post that I didn't know if I thought the reform was that big of a deal. I have to admit, my opinion has changed a bit. The minimum age for retirement is 62, but it also depends on the number of years you've worked. So if you go to college and don't start working until your late 20s, you'll end up still working by the age of 70. That does seem unfair to me. At the same time, I still have my doubts. Is it worth disfigured faces? I don't know. Is there no other way to protest than by destroying shops windows? I still don't know every detail of French politics of course, so I am probably missing a piece of the puzzle.
Being here during all this is exciting. It scares me a bit, but it is fascinating to see the way other countries are run. What is considered radical in the USA, protests and riots, is normal here. People are shocked when I say that I have only been to a few protest marches in my life. It just illustrates how arbitrary social and cultural norms are and how different countries can interpret things in very different ways. It is fascinating. And, it does mean that I get two weeks of vacation, whether I agree with the cause or not.
With that extra week of no school, my host sister and I went to stay in Caen (the biggest city in Normandy) with my host brother and his girlfriend. They have an appartement there and attend one of the universities. We stayed from Sunday night to Wednesday morning, and it was great. It made me want to go to college and have my own appartement and do my own grocery shopping and choose what I am going to do all day. Like I said last week, I like independence. Alice and I went shopping on Monday where I succeeded in finding a jacket that is both warm and fashionable, but I failed to find a sweater that met those requirements. I'm actually terrified of winter; if there is snow I don't know what I will do. They told us to pack light and not bring too much stuff. They should have told us to bring every warm item in every closet in the house. I definitely feel a bit underprepared. That night we went out to a movie, "Despicable Me", which was dubbed in French. I understood it! Yay! I think cartoons are good teachers because they exaggerate everything so much that you can follow the story and learn some new vocabulary. Tuesday was a relaxed day but we went out in the afternoon to the French version of Best Buy, and afterwords to get crepes and coffee. I felt French.
I think I'm going to Paris tomorrow! I'm really excited to see more of the city and of course see the family friends who invited me. I just hope I don't run into one of those mean police men...
Also, I'm still shy, but I'm trying to talk more. I really am. It has been difficult with no school because I'm not around everyone as much so I don't have as many opportunities. I will keep trying! And I've started watching friends in French. Sometimes I turn off the english subtitles, and I do understand the plot, but I miss a lot of the jokes so it's not as fun. I'll know I'm speaking good French when I turn of the subtitles and am still laughing my head off.
Miss you all so so so much.
Things are getting scary here. I know I have mentioned in almost all my blogs a strike or a protest that has resulted in fewer classes. There protest marches are continuing and becoming more frequent. In the cities they can be even riot-like, with people who break shop windows and jump on cars. They are now adding different forms of protest into the mix as well. There is a gas shortage because people "blocked" the oil refinery which means they put up a ton of barriers so that no one can get in and work. They are also doing this at schools, my school being a participent. What this means is every morning before it is light out the more political students search for anything to keep the gate closed, be that planks of wood or trash cans or chairs or tables. Then the other students arrive and, much to their disappointment, can't get to class. So I haven't had school since last thursday (the...14th I believe).
A couple days ago the national news channel featured my school as an example of this type of protest, called a "blocus". There was also another example of a school in a bigger city and things were getting a bit rowdier over there. What left the biggest impression on me was footage of a high school kid being shot by a police man with a paralyzer. It was ment to just stun him, which to me is bad enough because in the footage this kid didn't appear to be way out of line, but it hit him in the eye and disfigured his face. I turned, shocked, to my host mother and asked if it was legal for police to do that sort of thing. She responded that the police can get very violent in France. I believe her. I always wonder in these situations what the police man is thinking. Why doesn't he sympathize with the cause? The reform affects him too. How did he feel when he pulled the trigger with the goal of stunning a young kid that could be his child?
I said in one blog post that I didn't know if I thought the reform was that big of a deal. I have to admit, my opinion has changed a bit. The minimum age for retirement is 62, but it also depends on the number of years you've worked. So if you go to college and don't start working until your late 20s, you'll end up still working by the age of 70. That does seem unfair to me. At the same time, I still have my doubts. Is it worth disfigured faces? I don't know. Is there no other way to protest than by destroying shops windows? I still don't know every detail of French politics of course, so I am probably missing a piece of the puzzle.
Being here during all this is exciting. It scares me a bit, but it is fascinating to see the way other countries are run. What is considered radical in the USA, protests and riots, is normal here. People are shocked when I say that I have only been to a few protest marches in my life. It just illustrates how arbitrary social and cultural norms are and how different countries can interpret things in very different ways. It is fascinating. And, it does mean that I get two weeks of vacation, whether I agree with the cause or not.
With that extra week of no school, my host sister and I went to stay in Caen (the biggest city in Normandy) with my host brother and his girlfriend. They have an appartement there and attend one of the universities. We stayed from Sunday night to Wednesday morning, and it was great. It made me want to go to college and have my own appartement and do my own grocery shopping and choose what I am going to do all day. Like I said last week, I like independence. Alice and I went shopping on Monday where I succeeded in finding a jacket that is both warm and fashionable, but I failed to find a sweater that met those requirements. I'm actually terrified of winter; if there is snow I don't know what I will do. They told us to pack light and not bring too much stuff. They should have told us to bring every warm item in every closet in the house. I definitely feel a bit underprepared. That night we went out to a movie, "Despicable Me", which was dubbed in French. I understood it! Yay! I think cartoons are good teachers because they exaggerate everything so much that you can follow the story and learn some new vocabulary. Tuesday was a relaxed day but we went out in the afternoon to the French version of Best Buy, and afterwords to get crepes and coffee. I felt French.
I think I'm going to Paris tomorrow! I'm really excited to see more of the city and of course see the family friends who invited me. I just hope I don't run into one of those mean police men...
Also, I'm still shy, but I'm trying to talk more. I really am. It has been difficult with no school because I'm not around everyone as much so I don't have as many opportunities. I will keep trying! And I've started watching friends in French. Sometimes I turn off the english subtitles, and I do understand the plot, but I miss a lot of the jokes so it's not as fun. I'll know I'm speaking good French when I turn of the subtitles and am still laughing my head off.
Miss you all so so so much.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Still Swimming
This week was better. After the AFS reunion last weekend I was motivated to talk to people and keep trying. Well, minus thursday, I think I did talk more and be less shy. Tuesday was a strike day so I only had three hours of school and used the free time to go into town with some Frenchies who could show me around a bit. Wednesday was awesome because I actually understood my SES (economics) class and now have a vague idea of what is going on. That is the class with the teacher that talks a million words per minute, so this is a huge accomplishment. Huge. My comprehension goes up and down from day to day, but overall it is definitely improving. It was best Wednesday though, and I noticed that the day before that I didn't go on the computer all day. I think there's a correlation, because going on line means not being immersed in french anymore. So I'm starting a new internet diet, only a few times per week. We'll see how long my resolve lasts. But one with my week. Thursday was a down day. I was missing home and I was feeling extra timid and we had P.E. that day and I'm a terrible handball player. But whatever, it's done and Friday was back to being good. There was a "blocus" at school which meant people put up barriers that didn't allow anyone in as another form of protest. It's a common thing in France, for example the oil refinery was also blocked off. I've never heard of it in America. Anyway, no school so for most of the morning I was just hanging out outside the school with people. It was good because I did manage to talk more. I hope I can keep this up.
Things that were weird for me at first aren't as weird anymore. I'm getting used to boys using a lot of gel in their hair and I'm getting used to teachers just telling you the assignment once. I am not surprised when there is a protest or a strike anymore. It is normal for me to find the TV on with the news, and I don't giggle anymore when I see people walking down the street with five baguettes. I'm even used to the kissing-on-both-cheeks-to-say-hello thing. I like it. But I still don't know the exact etiquette. In America, I had the etiquette totally down for when to smile at someone (even down to teeth versus no teeth), when to wave and when to hug. But here I have to just follow the other person's lead. And I wonder, what happens after a couple breaks up or friends get in a fight? Do they still kiss? Because that would be kind of awkward...
Last night I went to a show. It was a combination of circus acrobatics and dance. It was pretty amazing. It was the first show I've been to here, and when I got to the theater I realized I'd been missing that. I go to a ton of shows in Berkeley because every week Alex Senauke has another play and I have a lot of talented friends in general. Not only was the show artistic and creative and astounding (the muscles! oh la vache!), but I just enjoyed the atmosphere. I got the feeling that French people go out to shows and performances more often than Americans, and everyone was excited to be there. I can't wait till the next show. Also, I think in the spring I have a dance performance too. I'm excited.
They say you learn about yourself while you are here. I know it is still the beginning and I have a lot more to learn, but there are some things I didn't really know before. I do not like being ignored; I like to be in the midst of things and I like talking to people. I like to be independent. You might think that going away for a year is incredibly independent, but a lot of times I feel like a little kid, needing others to help me get basic things. I don't like when people worry over me, but It is necessary while I still have the language skills of a five year old. I do care what people think about me, even if in the USA I said I didn't. I am very self conscious here. I love tomatoes, could eat them with every meal. I like to run. I hated running back home. Here it clears my mind and feels great. Lastly, I have learned that I like Halloween, which I always thought of as my least favorite holiday. I like how excited everyone gets leading up to it and preparing the decorations and costumes. I guess I just like atmospheres where everyone is really excited and into it, like theme parks or shows or Halloween. It's only been like a month and a half, so I wonder what else I will learn...
I miss home. At first, it just came in random days but now it's pretty constant. I don't want to be back home because I am so glad to be here and even with the struggles I'm enjoying it. But I want to just see everyone for a minute or too. I miss all my friends and family. I also miss mexican food, although I'm planning on making a mexican dinner one night. Maybe enchiladas. Yummm. But yes, I really do miss you all. Hope everyone is doing well. Write me! I like letters, and I like hearing all the boring details about your lives :).
Until next time!
Things that were weird for me at first aren't as weird anymore. I'm getting used to boys using a lot of gel in their hair and I'm getting used to teachers just telling you the assignment once. I am not surprised when there is a protest or a strike anymore. It is normal for me to find the TV on with the news, and I don't giggle anymore when I see people walking down the street with five baguettes. I'm even used to the kissing-on-both-cheeks-to-say-hello thing. I like it. But I still don't know the exact etiquette. In America, I had the etiquette totally down for when to smile at someone (even down to teeth versus no teeth), when to wave and when to hug. But here I have to just follow the other person's lead. And I wonder, what happens after a couple breaks up or friends get in a fight? Do they still kiss? Because that would be kind of awkward...
Last night I went to a show. It was a combination of circus acrobatics and dance. It was pretty amazing. It was the first show I've been to here, and when I got to the theater I realized I'd been missing that. I go to a ton of shows in Berkeley because every week Alex Senauke has another play and I have a lot of talented friends in general. Not only was the show artistic and creative and astounding (the muscles! oh la vache!), but I just enjoyed the atmosphere. I got the feeling that French people go out to shows and performances more often than Americans, and everyone was excited to be there. I can't wait till the next show. Also, I think in the spring I have a dance performance too. I'm excited.
They say you learn about yourself while you are here. I know it is still the beginning and I have a lot more to learn, but there are some things I didn't really know before. I do not like being ignored; I like to be in the midst of things and I like talking to people. I like to be independent. You might think that going away for a year is incredibly independent, but a lot of times I feel like a little kid, needing others to help me get basic things. I don't like when people worry over me, but It is necessary while I still have the language skills of a five year old. I do care what people think about me, even if in the USA I said I didn't. I am very self conscious here. I love tomatoes, could eat them with every meal. I like to run. I hated running back home. Here it clears my mind and feels great. Lastly, I have learned that I like Halloween, which I always thought of as my least favorite holiday. I like how excited everyone gets leading up to it and preparing the decorations and costumes. I guess I just like atmospheres where everyone is really excited and into it, like theme parks or shows or Halloween. It's only been like a month and a half, so I wonder what else I will learn...
I miss home. At first, it just came in random days but now it's pretty constant. I don't want to be back home because I am so glad to be here and even with the struggles I'm enjoying it. But I want to just see everyone for a minute or too. I miss all my friends and family. I also miss mexican food, although I'm planning on making a mexican dinner one night. Maybe enchiladas. Yummm. But yes, I really do miss you all. Hope everyone is doing well. Write me! I like letters, and I like hearing all the boring details about your lives :).
Until next time!
Sunday, October 10, 2010
AFS Weekend
Right when I was starting to feel like this was getting really hard, right when the frustration and homesickness started to kick in, this weekend came along and lifted me back up. This weekend was the first AFS reunion for my chapter in Normandy, so the first time I've seen the other Normandy kids since we drove off in different directions to start our new lives. We are 10 in Normandy, two swiss, one german, one russian, one chinese, one brazilian, two american, one danish and one norwegian. We met up around 2ish on Saturday, and it was immediately comfortable. There was no awkward silence to start off. As soon as everyone was together, we set off for the "party room" where we ate our meals and swapped stories and slept incredibly uncomfortably.
At about 3:30 we went to a carnival together. It was jam-packed because it is here for just the weekend.. I know some people hate crowds and rides and all things carnival-y, but I am definitely an amusent park kind of person. There were tons of stands with crepes and churros and other frenchy snacks and also stands with baguettes and sausages and turkish kebabs and even cotton candy. There were lots of stands selling clothes or other knick-knacks, like the flea markets back home. But there were also rides, which made it about 10000000 times better than a flea market. It was overall just fun, being with friends and being in the middle of something so energetic.
It was the first time in a month that I really really felt like I had friends again. I love the french and they are really very nice to me. But it's different. With them, I am so shy and can't show who I am and what I'm really thinking. Small talk only gets you so far. With the AFS kids, even though we are all from different countries and cultures and backgrounds, it is so easy to talk and laugh and be myself. I feel like I have known them all ages. I think it is because we are all sharing such a huge experience and know how everyone else is feeling, so it is easy to let go. It is also, of course, easier to be myself in English, but I think that even if we had all been speaking in french I would have felt comfortable. I had completely forgotten what it felt like that first weekend here, how easy it was to make friends, and it was nice to be reminded. We shared good and bad stories about our host-families, complained about tests and taking notes in school, laughed ourselves silly over the volunteers who had had a few too many drinks, and remarked on all the crazy cultural differences. We are not all from the same culture so some of our observations were different (like the Brazilian thinks the coffee is way too weak while the other American finds it very strong), but a lot of our observations were actually the same. We all noticed how much the French like deserts and we all think that the teachers expect you to do more on your own. I loved hearing all the different stories and interpretations, probably could have kept talking for days.
Dinner was good and french. For beverages, we had the option of orange juice, water, coca cola, or wine. Yes, AFS served us alcohol. After dinner we had interviews with the volunteers where we talked about our integration at home and school. Then, around midnight, we had a rousing game of musical chairs, which I apparently suck at. After that it was just more talking and hanging out, finally falling to sleep somewhere around 3 or 4 in the morning. This morning we had breakfast and then walked around the little square near us. The sun was out and beautiful and the grass was green and soft. Eventually our families arrived and it was time to leave. I didn't really want to say goodbye, but I am determined to see those people again soon. The weekend was such a pick-me-up. A reminder of why I'm here. It motivated me to keep trying to talk and make friends at school and reassured me that others are going through the same thing.
School is still school. I had a history test friday. It was hard. I'm starting to get used to the schedule; I even remembered all my classes on monday without looking at my timetable. This week was a bit harder because I felt less motivated. It was harder to stay focused. But I think I can regain that focus, so no worries. It is late so I've gotta go. Miss you all!!
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Struggles
Struggles:
Exhaustion. You are fine one week, and then all of a sudden it knocks you over the head. The adrenaline that has been feeding you for the month runs out, and the exhaustion comes charging in. The first day I was tired enough to have trouble keeping my eyes open, I figured it was just because I'd had a difficult day and gotten more exercise than I have in a while. Then, after two more days of the same feeling, I realized that this exhaustion may take a while to shake off (and it doesn't help that I just woke up at 8:30 after going to bed near 3 AM). To understand French, I have to pay attention. Once I stop trying to understand, I stop understanding. I can let my mind wander when someone is speaking English and still register what they are saying. Not in French. And paying constant attention, struggling to separate the words in the sentences my teachers or friends say, that's tiring. When I take notes, I will focus on writing a word and then realize I have missed five more words that the teacher said while I was writing. And then, if I have overcome the struggle to keep up and take notes (or just copied my neighbor's notes), there is the new struggle of trying to understand them and learn about the Industrial Revolution. That's tiring too. I'm tired.
Homework. School work in general. The teachers don't write assignments on the board or hand you a typed sheet of important dates. They tell you once and then it's up to you to remember. And you can't go in and ask them after school, because they change classrooms every period and you don't know where they'll be. Many times I get to school and there was an assignment I had never heard or a test I didn't know about. You say to yourself, "oh there is a half day on Wednesday, I can catch up then." Wednesday comes, and you look at your assignments, and you realize you don't understand 9/10ths of the work. Pretty soon, you realize that in Economics you have about a thousand uncompleted work sheets.
Eating. It may not sound hard, but switching up the main meal of the day is really confusing. Lunch is the huge meal, not dinner. Breakfast is not really a full meal. But I get hungry at breakfast, really hungry. I'm used to my dad's huge weekend breakfasts of popovers and waffles and homefries and eggs. So I end up eating about four bowls of cereal. Then lunch comes along, and I am barely hungary. But lunch is when all the delicious food is served! Dinner will probably be leftovers from lunch the day before; this is my chance to enjoy French cuisine. That is a dilema. My lactose intolerance hasn't actually caused me that many problems because my family understands and is very willing to help me out. They don't always understand what I can't eat, but I have never gone to a meal and found nothing to munch on. When in doubt, there is always bread. No, the real problems come from the schedule. I better get used to it soon.
Missing my family and friends. When I am talking to people or dancing (had my first hip hop class this week, too early to tell if I really love it or not) or working or watching gossip girl with Alice I feel fine. It is when things slow down, when people stop trying to talk to me, when there is nothing to do, that the missing feelings come out of the woodwork. I start to think that if only this person was here, they could cheer me up and make me laugh. If only my parents were here to vent to, and give me words of encouragement. It hasn't been too much of a problem, because most of the time things are happening and I am caught up in marveling at France and all things French. But there have been a couple days where I really feel it.
Rain. Cold. More rain. Wind. Maybe snow this winter. And rain. It is not a good sign for your health when your toes start to turn blue. And it is not a good sign of your intelligence when you are wearing shoes that allow you to see your toes in weather that can turn them blue.
But don't worry, it's not all bad. Not even mostly bad. Just a little bit hard sometimes. Mostly, I love it here. I feel like I am really starting to make some friends. Comprehension is slowly becoming easier. Speaking is still hard, but it looks like there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I love going into town and browsing the shops and buying a crepe or a pastry to snack on. Karate is fun, and it feels great to get exercise. Art class was more interesting this week (there was a lot of doing nothing in the previous classes). I got 100 percent on my math test, which is a rare score in France. The grading is really different here. It is on a 20 point scale, and a 10 is like a C. 14 is a great score, and higher than that is hard to achieve. Not in math, because there is always a right and wrong answer. But in other classes, the grading is pretty subjective. If everyone gets an 8 in the class, 8 is good. If everyone gets 16, 8 is awful. Passing depends on weather the teacher wants to pass you. I'm not sure exactly how the grading is going to translate to the American school system...
The French school system has given me an appreciation for the American school system. Not to say it is bad, there are a lot of good things about it. The languages are way superior to the way languages are taught in America. It annoys me that all the French kids are able to speak better English than I am able to speak French. They are probably even reading this right now. But here, by your junior year of high school you have to know what you want to do for the rest of your life. You have to choose between S (sciences), ES (economics and social sciences--I chose this one) or L (literature) and that choice will effect the jobs you can get later in life. If you want to be a doctor, you absolutely have to choose S. That is a lot of pressure for a 16 year old. All the teachers (with the exception of maybe my English teacher) really know their stuff, though. They are all definitely qualified to teach, which I can not say about some BHS teachers. But the myth that the French are way ahead of us isn't really true (I heard that about the school system before I left); I have already learned everything in math class so far and lots in history. I guess I'm saying I expected it to be a whole lot better hear. It's not better or worse, just different. There are things I prefer in America, and things I prefer here.
Quickly, before I go make pancakes for my French friends. I love learning the slang here. They say "C'est chaud!" which literally means "that's hot!" here to say "that's hard" or "that's difficult." I told them what "hot" was slang for in America; they found it pretty funny.
That's all for now! Au revoir!!
Exhaustion. You are fine one week, and then all of a sudden it knocks you over the head. The adrenaline that has been feeding you for the month runs out, and the exhaustion comes charging in. The first day I was tired enough to have trouble keeping my eyes open, I figured it was just because I'd had a difficult day and gotten more exercise than I have in a while. Then, after two more days of the same feeling, I realized that this exhaustion may take a while to shake off (and it doesn't help that I just woke up at 8:30 after going to bed near 3 AM). To understand French, I have to pay attention. Once I stop trying to understand, I stop understanding. I can let my mind wander when someone is speaking English and still register what they are saying. Not in French. And paying constant attention, struggling to separate the words in the sentences my teachers or friends say, that's tiring. When I take notes, I will focus on writing a word and then realize I have missed five more words that the teacher said while I was writing. And then, if I have overcome the struggle to keep up and take notes (or just copied my neighbor's notes), there is the new struggle of trying to understand them and learn about the Industrial Revolution. That's tiring too. I'm tired.
Homework. School work in general. The teachers don't write assignments on the board or hand you a typed sheet of important dates. They tell you once and then it's up to you to remember. And you can't go in and ask them after school, because they change classrooms every period and you don't know where they'll be. Many times I get to school and there was an assignment I had never heard or a test I didn't know about. You say to yourself, "oh there is a half day on Wednesday, I can catch up then." Wednesday comes, and you look at your assignments, and you realize you don't understand 9/10ths of the work. Pretty soon, you realize that in Economics you have about a thousand uncompleted work sheets.
Eating. It may not sound hard, but switching up the main meal of the day is really confusing. Lunch is the huge meal, not dinner. Breakfast is not really a full meal. But I get hungry at breakfast, really hungry. I'm used to my dad's huge weekend breakfasts of popovers and waffles and homefries and eggs. So I end up eating about four bowls of cereal. Then lunch comes along, and I am barely hungary. But lunch is when all the delicious food is served! Dinner will probably be leftovers from lunch the day before; this is my chance to enjoy French cuisine. That is a dilema. My lactose intolerance hasn't actually caused me that many problems because my family understands and is very willing to help me out. They don't always understand what I can't eat, but I have never gone to a meal and found nothing to munch on. When in doubt, there is always bread. No, the real problems come from the schedule. I better get used to it soon.
Missing my family and friends. When I am talking to people or dancing (had my first hip hop class this week, too early to tell if I really love it or not) or working or watching gossip girl with Alice I feel fine. It is when things slow down, when people stop trying to talk to me, when there is nothing to do, that the missing feelings come out of the woodwork. I start to think that if only this person was here, they could cheer me up and make me laugh. If only my parents were here to vent to, and give me words of encouragement. It hasn't been too much of a problem, because most of the time things are happening and I am caught up in marveling at France and all things French. But there have been a couple days where I really feel it.
Rain. Cold. More rain. Wind. Maybe snow this winter. And rain. It is not a good sign for your health when your toes start to turn blue. And it is not a good sign of your intelligence when you are wearing shoes that allow you to see your toes in weather that can turn them blue.
But don't worry, it's not all bad. Not even mostly bad. Just a little bit hard sometimes. Mostly, I love it here. I feel like I am really starting to make some friends. Comprehension is slowly becoming easier. Speaking is still hard, but it looks like there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I love going into town and browsing the shops and buying a crepe or a pastry to snack on. Karate is fun, and it feels great to get exercise. Art class was more interesting this week (there was a lot of doing nothing in the previous classes). I got 100 percent on my math test, which is a rare score in France. The grading is really different here. It is on a 20 point scale, and a 10 is like a C. 14 is a great score, and higher than that is hard to achieve. Not in math, because there is always a right and wrong answer. But in other classes, the grading is pretty subjective. If everyone gets an 8 in the class, 8 is good. If everyone gets 16, 8 is awful. Passing depends on weather the teacher wants to pass you. I'm not sure exactly how the grading is going to translate to the American school system...
The French school system has given me an appreciation for the American school system. Not to say it is bad, there are a lot of good things about it. The languages are way superior to the way languages are taught in America. It annoys me that all the French kids are able to speak better English than I am able to speak French. They are probably even reading this right now. But here, by your junior year of high school you have to know what you want to do for the rest of your life. You have to choose between S (sciences), ES (economics and social sciences--I chose this one) or L (literature) and that choice will effect the jobs you can get later in life. If you want to be a doctor, you absolutely have to choose S. That is a lot of pressure for a 16 year old. All the teachers (with the exception of maybe my English teacher) really know their stuff, though. They are all definitely qualified to teach, which I can not say about some BHS teachers. But the myth that the French are way ahead of us isn't really true (I heard that about the school system before I left); I have already learned everything in math class so far and lots in history. I guess I'm saying I expected it to be a whole lot better hear. It's not better or worse, just different. There are things I prefer in America, and things I prefer here.
Quickly, before I go make pancakes for my French friends. I love learning the slang here. They say "C'est chaud!" which literally means "that's hot!" here to say "that's hard" or "that's difficult." I told them what "hot" was slang for in America; they found it pretty funny.
That's all for now! Au revoir!!
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